S05E144 - The Humble Path to Peak Performance: Humility in CrossFit
Ever found yourself scrolling through a flood of fitness feats on Instagram and wondering where humility fits into the picture? That's exactly the kind of question coaches David Syvertsen @davesy85 and Sam Rhee @bergencosmetictackle in our latest HerdFit episode. We're peeling back the layers on the often-unnoticed virtue of humility in the CrossFit community, sharing raw experiences and reflecting on how an ego in check—or unchecked—can shape the core of our fitness families.
Get ready for a deep and meaningful conversation that's not just about nailing your next PR. We're talking about the art of staying humble while sharing personal triumphs, and how coaches like us can spotlight our members' achievements without overshadowing them with our own stories. Hear about our own run-in with the arrogance of skipping a prescribed warm-up, and how it served as a humbling reminder of the importance of following our own coach's advice. We speak to the significance of coachability among athletes and how a humble approach can lead to peak performance.
As we wrap up, we look beyond the barbells and chalked hands to the ways humility impacts our daily communications. From apologizing for and learning from errors to ensuring everyone in our gym communities feels valued—no matter their status outside the gym walls—we're underlining why humility is a heavyweight champion in its own right. Don't miss this call to action for a more grounded approach to fitness and life that champions mutual respect and personal growth.
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S05E144 - The Humble Path to Peak Performance: Humility in CrossFit
TRANSCRIPT
David Syvertsen
Host
00:05
Hey everybody, welcome to the Herd Fit Podcast with Dr Sam Rhee and myself, Coach David Syvertsen. His podcast is aimed at helping anyone and everyone looking to enhance their healthy lifestyle through fitness, nutrition and, most importantly, mindset. All right, welcome back to the Herd Fit Podcast. I'm Coach David Syvertsen. I'm here with my co-host, dr and Coach Sam Rhee. We have an interesting topic today.
00:29
It's interesting to me because I've been wanting to do this for over a year and I've had like four different outlines, three different outlines, and I erased this and I'm just going to go for it. I'm just going to wing it, and by wing it, I mean I just want to put this out there because I think it's really important and I think it's under talked about and I think it's the root of a lot of problems that athletes, coaches and communities have and people in general. And it's about humility and crossfit, and I want to make sure, before we start, this is not going to be preachy. I'm going to try hard too. We get that sometimes right. This is not going to be. You need to live this way. If not, you're a bad person. And I'm going to prove it during this, where I'm going to bring up several examples where I have not been humble, and this isn't one of these. Like 10 years ago I wasn't humble, but now I am Like I'll give you an example from last week where I wasn't humble, and I think it's a back and forth battle that we lose awareness of example hey, that person's nice. I think I'm a nice person. I wasn't nice two nights ago when I like snap that actually about something stupid. That wasn't nice of me. So am I nice or do I just have certain moments that I'm nice? Am I humble? Are you humble or you just have certain moments that you're humble?
01:43
And I actually think I've read books on this, I read excerpts on it that I think there's a disconnect between what humility is and how we can impact you as a person, as an athlete, as a coach, as a gym owner for those of you out there. And I really like diving into it and I like talking about it, I like reflecting on it, because it's a back and forth up and down battle, especially with the era that we live in right now, with social media. You know, like you know every now and then you make a post or say something and it's like am I coming across a certain way, and then you don't want to or you don't care, and then maybe others think about that a certain way and you really can put yourself into this like tornado of thoughts and emotions. That to me, it's just a complete waste of time as long as you have this baseline humility about you. So I want to dive into it and Sam I didn't give a Sam a warning about this. I'm going to give you no more than three sentences, and it could be less.
02:41
What is humility?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
02:44
That's a really good one, I would say. The first thing I would say is being humble means not well thinking of others before you think of yourself. Okay, let me put it that way.
David Syvertsen
Host
03:02
I like that because that's like the selfless approach. Right, you're not selfish, you're thinking about others and my definition is right in line with that, in that you're not better than anyone out there. That's kind of like the way I would sum it up. Humility to me is you living not just saying it out loud like you living in a manner that as if you're not better than anyone, you don't deserve more than others, even though sometimes you do get some more than others, and that could be again. I'm going to try to keep my best to keep this to CrossFit only and if you want to go apply it to life, you can.
03:35
But how do we feel humility is viewed in this CrossFit space that we're in, and I think we look at others and call them humble or not humble. Much more often than we than we ever look inward and say am I being humble, am I not being humble? And why do we think that is right? Like I have, I can list off 10 people in my head that I'm like yeah, they don't have the humility trait in their head, and I remember back to when Instagram started to being a thing and Christian hair is one of the best CrossFitters in the world looks amazing, has built a great business for himself, owns a gym, has a brand, he's got a lot of followers and I remember him just like constantly posting these videos of himself working out and all even if you want to make, and he's like a CrossFit celebrity and these guys the guys got sponsors left and right because of how he looks right. If that's too fantasy T, you don't know who he is.
04:34
Dan Dodd we've had here before. I remember he was one of the first guys that I've ever seen post videos of himself working out and I remember judging him from the outside someone that didn't have Instagram at the time. I was like what a cocky mother effort. Like why do you posting videos? And last week I'm personal training someone and we're talking about social media and she goes like, yeah, I hate when people post workout videos of themselves. It's so cocky. I'm like, oh crap, I do that and she follows me on Instagram. So now it makes me start to think do I had that perception right?
05:07
I post videos of my workouts a lot and I have my own reasons for them and I can get into them if you want. But we often will say this about others that person is doing it because they're showing off, they're cocky, they're not humble. How often do we do this to ourselves? Am I being? Do I lack humility by the way I talk about it? By the way I judge all this stuff? Do you, in conversations that you have because you're a talker, you have a lot of? You talk with a lot of different people, different perceptions, different relationships. Do you see what I'm saying there in regards to humility, that that kind of topic comes up a lot?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
05:42
Absolutely, and I think what you're touching on here is that people have different perceptions of others in terms of whether they think they're humble or not. I guarantee you, if we look at our gym, we could each find someone who would say, yeah, sam's not humble, or hey, dave's not humble Absolutely. And then we'd also have people say, yeah, dave is really a humble guy. And it depends on what prism you're sort of looking at these people. It's like every figure. If you asked 100 people, is Taylor Swift a humble person, right, like I don't know, a bunch of them would say yes, and then a bunch of would be like, no, she's got a $40 million jet, she's not a humble person. What are you talking about?
06:21
So I think the key is you can't really control what other people's perception are of you, and I am pretty sure that there are a lot of situations and I'm sure you'll get into it where what's perceived, what is healthy self-esteem, what's self-confidence, what's, you know, self-assuredness at the gym? You know whatever it is can be regarded as arrogance and when it's, when that person is actually extremely humble when it comes to their performances at the gym and what they do. I know some athletes here who think certain really great athletes are arrogant as F, but they're not. They just are really focused on their training and what they're doing Dialed in Okay. So I think some of this is you could go down this rabbit hole of am I humble? Am I doing enough, that's you know? Do I display enough humility? I think some of this has to be your own perception of yourself and who you think you are. You can't always worry, like you said, about someone seeing what you do Absolutely and judging you for whether you truly are humble or not.
David Syvertsen
Host
07:31
So and this whole topic, that's really been in my head for a long time. Like I have expectations of myself and trying to live in a humble manner, and sometimes I fail, just like sometimes I fail to be nice right, and sometimes I fail to be selfless. And you know, bring up Dan, that example, dan, if you know Dan, dan is very humble. He's a great dude. He's a great athlete, great coach, great husband, great father, great teacher. Like he, everything about him is is very humble. But before I knew him, all I saw was Instagram.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
08:02
Well, if you, just watch his posts. All he does is post snatching like 5 million pounds. So you're like, is that a humble dude?
David Syvertsen
Host
08:09
If you just looked at that post Exactly and if you don't know him, it's very easy Like I don't know Christian Harris. So, like you know, he's probably like who the eff is this guy from Bison talking about me Like he hasn't ever had a conversation with my life? And this is where I check myself on, trying to avoid judgment on people I don't know. That is a sign of humility, because circle back to the definition of humility is I've never had a at that point, I never had a conversation with Dan. At this point, I've never had a conversation with Christian Harris. So who am I to even open up that door? Is this guy humble or not? Because if I am going to go down that path and say, hey, I've never asked this guy a question before and I've had a conversation, which of those two in that interaction is the one that lacks humility? It's me Right, and so this is, and I really am trying to really learn more about it and live it in a way where it actually has changed me and how much I judge other people. You just kind of take them for what they are and then it comes down to you get to know them. Are they respectful, do they put others before themselves, like all that stuff, like but that can only happen as you get to know them. You're not going to get to know someone by scrolling through their Instagram. So that's an expectation I have of myself. What about expectation of others? What is my expectation of other people? For them to contribute to this gym, right To the CrossFit community as a whole, out of humility and it's a pretty simple concept to me. It has little, very little to do about you bragging or not, right? If you asked me what humility was five years ago, I'm like do they brag? Okay, they're not humble. No, no. That's kind of just one part of humility to me. What I expect of others in regard to humility, whether you're an athlete, a coach, an owner, a bystander that comes into this gym because remember, not telling you how to live your life, I am telling you how to be in this gym.
09:59
Right in terms of treating others, it's how much they avoid judging others without proper information We've talked about that gossip episode that we've talked about the culture episode that we've talked about and how much do they like to highlight others, and it doesn't have to be on social media. I really am trying to get away from the social media. It's just the one thing that always pops in my head. But when they show up to an open gym on a Sunday, are they talking about your score with you or are they talking about their own score with you?
10:30
Hey, sam, how was your workout? And you're like well, I wrote a 205, oh, I was at a two minute pace, did you? Hey, sam, did you go five and five on a deadlift? And you're like, well, I went singles, but what would you do? Like that, to me, is something that I always notice at the gym, because every conversation turned into what you do and I catch myself. I did this last week and I caught myself that I was asking someone about the dumbbell snatch and we were talking about touch and go versus breaking them up. And right after they told me what they did, I told them what I did, and that, to me, is a bad job. That lacks humility. You're there asking them the question about their workout, like, shut up about yourself. What do you think about?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
11:13
that. Yeah, that is a good sign because I will. When people ask yes, you're right, If someone uses a conversation for themselves, that's always a problem, Like that's a warning sign. It's a warning sign.
11:28
And I don't really mind so much sometimes, because sometimes someone really killed it, yeah, and they're really proud of themselves and that's okay. Like maybe they had never gotten double unders before and they got like a hundred today, like that's awesome and I want to praise that with you, yes, and I'm also because I realize as my role as coach that's my role here is to draw people out in terms of, like, tell me about your performance, tell me what you're doing, because I do want to know as a coach, like if you hadn't had double unders and you got them this open. I want to know as a coach. So I usually, so I don't in this situation, I don't actually worry so much about that. I do.
12:12
If they're like hey, sam, how'd you do on this? I did this. Like no, I would rather you just come to me and say, hey, sam, I got double unders this workout and I was like, yeah, that's awesome. Like I was able to get like five rounds and I only was expecting to get three, like that's great. But if they ask you and then like, flip it, yes, then I understand where they're coming from with it.
David Syvertsen
Host
12:32
Here's an example happened today. Rafi comes up to me and I was like, rafi, didn't you do this already? He goes. Yeah, yeah, I tried our acts Today. I want to do the scaled. I was like, oh okay, he goes. Yeah, my double unders. I was just all over the place and I was like, all right, that's cool, like you're going to crush scale than he did.
12:46
I think he absolutely crushed it today as a coach and as someone that wants to make sure he's not feeling down on himself, which I'm sure he's not.
12:54
I gave him my story from the open in 2012, my first open, I didn't have double unders and the workout was 150 wall balls, 90 double unders, 30 rainbow slopes, amrap, 14. And I got 150 wall balls done under seven minutes and then for the next seven minutes I did 34 double unders. That was my score. It took me seven minutes and like, and I say that I bring up that story and I'm like, hey, been there right. And this is where I think it gets a little rough as a coach, because you do want to give your examples, your past experiences, to help them out. Like Rafi, that open workout yesterday, I bet that makes you get your double unders for next year, Because you don't want to have to sit something out because of the jump rope. And that's what, because this XYZ happened to me Is that should a coach find different ways to instill confidence, teach lessons, or is it okay to bring up personal experience in that regard?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
13:47
I think that probably is helpful sometimes. I think it depends on the person and the situation. Like, I think that that probably was positive for Rafi, right? I think a lot of times I just we're more like sounding boards where we're just kind of like hearing what they have to say and that's all they want. Yeah, they just want to have that ear and have that understanding. That was probably a very good anecdote. I would say, yeah, probably for Rafi, and the situation.
David Syvertsen
Host
14:16
Yeah, that's where an area I struggle with, because I do. I have loads of stories. Does it change the story if I just change someone's name out, like, oh, I know someone that did this?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
14:24
I would say it depends. My rule is I can only say an anecdote once a month. If I say it more than that, I know double unders. Oh my God. I remember when I did the like. That's not my like. If I do that I notice I'm making it about myself. So I only I'm allowed. I try to allow myself telling a story once a month.
David Syvertsen
Host
14:45
That's it, coaches, when you are in class, whether you're stretching, warming up, you're at the whiteboard. How often you should keep tabs on this. I've noticed this with some coachings in the past. How often are you talking about yourself? Are you talking about, and it could be your workout, it could be your life? You know, because, to me, paying members are coming to your gym to be served, right, that's why they're here. They're not here to see you, by the way, coaches, they're here to be served. They're paying a membership for the services of the gym, except for some of our coaches.
15:15
Yeah oh yeah, we all love you. Blah, blah, blah.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
15:17
I love our coaches.
David Syvertsen
Host
15:17
I wanna see them, but they're here for the workout, they're here for the class, they're here for the community, right? And if we're gonna constantly hear that coach talk about their lives, rather than how are you doing, what's up with you, that to me is like it's a red flag, like if you constantly find yourself talking about your life, your stories, your stresses, right, but you're not asking everyone else. That to me, is like that's a clear sign of lack of humility, absolutely From a coaching perspective.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
15:43
Good point, and there are coaches who do that. I don't know so much here, but I have seen that very often.
David Syvertsen
Host
15:48
Oh yeah, I mean, I remember seeing a celebrity coach. She's a games athlete and she was coaching and she used to do this every time she coached a class. This is not a huge deal again. Don't know her so I'm not gonna judge her, all right but I remember she used to take a selfie, a video selfie, of the whole gym while they're doing the WAD and from my perspective, it's cool to do that every now and then.
16:07
But if you're doing every class, like here's my 5 AM, here's my 6 AM, it's like this isn't about you, it's about the class, and they're literally working out behind you with shitty form, like that could be a red flag to me in terms of humility and what you're actually truly there for. How does this relate to CrossFit performance? Some people are again. You come here and you're allowed to be this way. I'm here for myself, I'm here to perform, I'm here to work out, I'm here to compete, I'm here to train. I have so many responsibilities outside the gym. Don't tell me how to be at the gym, dave. I'm here for myself and that is totally acceptable. I have a lot of those days. I wish I had more to be honest with you. I wish I could come here and just like shut up, I'm here to work out. I have headphones on, that means don't talk to me, all right.
16:50
Your performance, in my opinion, can improve.
16:53
You can become fitter if you think about humility throughout the workout, throughout the days you're before and after, from the sheer selfish standpoint that I think you're gonna have more people in your corner if you live in a humble and act in a humble manner and that kind of support can help really elevate you, and that's why I love this gym so much that I really feel like we raise each other up, whether it's hey, I did well on this workout, now that person's gonna do well, or it's hey, I helped this person out with my lift, that's gonna make that person wanna help that person with the gymnastics.
17:27
There's this kind of like we feed off each other type ethos here and it does. It can come from humility, meaning you're putting others before yourself. Dave Al said this to me one time. He goes like it's contagious. Tee said this to me last week it's contagious, you like to act a certain way here that like hey, everyone here is really giving and supportive. I feel like I should be that way as well and we all rise together for that, because of that format.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
17:53
We have a lot of really good athletes that are that way and they do it in different ways, and I'm thinking of a couple different examples. I think of Sean O'Hara. He gives a crap load to everybody, shows up, brings whatever he's got, also is really working to help everyone else around him. He's a touchstone at the gym. And then I think of someone who's different, like your brother, aaron shows up at 5 am, extremely competitive, like he really wants to kill the workout. Whatever extent he can, whatever his score is, whatever he does whether it's overhead squats or row he'll do what he can and then he'll leave and sometimes it's the most amazing performance. Sometimes, if it's overhead squat, maybe not the most amazing performance, but it doesn't matter.
18:43
He's not bragging when he does well, he doesn't. He's not quiet when he doesn't do well. It's always the same. It would be what you would expect for a pastor, basically, like you know. But it's not that he's not, it's humility, but it's coupled with not like aw shucks, like I'm not gonna do well or whatever. No, he rings it.
19:07
And if I was next to him and if I was competing next to him, I know he would do everything he could to outperform me because he's got that competitive fire, but he's not a, but he's very humble, very humble when it comes to it. So there are different ways of sort of expressing it. And then I think of people who have health issues. I was thinking of someone who just had surgery, probably one of the most humble guys that we have here, and I've been thinking about him a lot in his recovery. And I just think that there are a lot of people you never know what they're going through. They're just super positive people at the gym, whether they're high or low, and you would never know anything else about them other than they're just. They just bring a great presence to the gym. Yeah, great vibe.
David Syvertsen
Host
20:05
Most of our gym is interpersonal interactions, right? People interacting with each other? Very rarely. You come to this gym and not interacting with someone in some manner, right?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
20:15
The people that bother me sometimes are the ones who come up and they're like oh, okay, so for this workout and I saw someone do this you have to break up the deadlifts. You must do that. Four, three, three, okay. And I'm like where are you coming off telling this person that you have to do anything Like unless they ask.
20:34
Even as a coach, I never tell anyone what to do. I ask them what are you planning on doing for this? And then I hear what they have to say and then if they, I'm like listen first, talk something. Yeah. And I'm always like okay, and why did you plan that? If it sounds good, I'm good with it. I'm never gonna sit there and be like you must go unbroken on this. Unless I really know them and this is something that we've talked about many times before I wanna hear what they have to say first. I am not perfect by any means as a coach and I think if you throw someone off their strategy, you could mess them up Like what's the big deal? Breaking it up five and five versus going unbroken? I mean, come on, you know so. So I do see people who they?
David Syvertsen
Host
21:19
I don't again, I'm not trying to judge, but they are not necessarily showing signs of humility when they talked to me Right, yeah, and it's like one of those little things like oh God, dave and Sam, you're a little overreacting to something simple like that, like someone's literally trying to help, and that's where I think our perception of what help is is not real help. Like you might be wrong, like you might be going up to someone and like you shouting out a four, three, three rep scheme to them might be like, dude, we what? Like my coach just told me this, or I was thinking about this. Your intentions are fine, but humility is not just about intentions. Humility is about, again, you're not always going to be right. What you think, what you say, is not always right. And the timing and the way you say it. Like you know, if I asked someone like hey, what was your body language and your tone of your voice like when you said that? I guarantee most people are like I don't know, I just said it. Well, like, do you understand? Like the nonverbal, nonverbal interactions with people actually mean a lot more than just your words. So true, so like, if you're not present with that idea, like you might be screwing them up. Yes, clap, clap, you're trying to help, but you're not. And then the and like a lack of humility is you don't, you're not aware that it's like really a lack of self-awareness that you're not helping. Yeah, coachability this for from the athlete's perspective. All right, I'm going to give an example where I lacked humility. I've shared this before so I hope no one remembers that I could act like it's new.
22:44
The first year I had to coach Toronto, it was an open workout that we might actually see as a repeat this upcoming week and thrusters, toes of bar, front squats, thrusters, chest of bar front squats, thrusters, muscle-ups, front squats and then a max lift after of clean hand clean squat or deadlift, whatever. It was a really nasty. I actually think it was one of the top five hardest open workouts ever. I was in shambles. I did really poorly compared to what my capacity was at the time. I didn't miss, I don't think I mispaced it, I just did poorly and I sent my coach my score and I was like man, like we both were, like you should be finishing this an X amount of time and I wasn't even close. I got capped out, I think.
23:28
And he goes did you do my warm-up? I was like no, I didn't do the warm-up, I was actually. I did it Thursday night with the whole gym. So I was getting people's zones taped up and I was getting the heat set up. I was setting up judges and my intentions were what they were nice, I'm hiding to help people out at the gym. I'm a gym owner, I'm a coach. You guys get lined up, I'll go, I skip the entire warm-up and he goes don't ever not do a warm-up again that I program for you, or just tell me and I'll stop programming for you.
24:00
And that, to me, was a lack of humility, where my coach put in time and effort for my plan to get me to my highest result and I literally stepped on top of it, squished it with my shoe and said, screw it, I'm on my own, I'm good, I'll, coach, cross it, I'm a competitor. All right, I'm going to go do this myself. And that is a lack of humility. That we can come up with reasons in our heads why I didn't do it and they might be justified from the outside, but I put myself my opinion in front of the coach that I was paying.
24:31
That to me was like that was the last time I did that too, because that was like that is not coachable and I can experience, I can empathize with that from a coach, like there's a lot of things you do, whether it's programming, and they don't do it. Or you give them a suggestion, they don't do it, that you tell them to slow down and work on pacing, they don't do it. Hey, come in and work on your engine, they don't do it. And they come back like why am I not getting the results in my head? I'm like that is the answer and you take that as disrespect. What do you think about that?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
25:01
That is so true, I would say, from both sides. As a coach, you had better make sure what you ask of your athletes is real, Like don't program a warmup, don't program whatever, don't give strategies or tips if they're not really things that you truly believe in, and in return the athletes should follow, or try to follow, what you're coaching to the best of their ability. And I've seen it kind of break down both ways, where the coach isn't really sort of putting the most effort they could into whatever it is that they're coaching for that class and the athletes sort of realize, and so they're just kind of half-assing it on the other and then the athletes are not taking what the coach is really sort of trying to help them with and they're just kind of letting it go on their own. And I've done that.
25:57
I've sat there literally a couple of weeks ago and being like this is a stupid warmup, I don't wanna do it. I won't do it or I'll run it. I've seen athletes run to the bathroom. We have athletes every freaking class who don't do what we ask them to do, almost intentionally. I'm thinking of one person in general and specifically, and with who I won't call out. But you're right, give it a chance both ways relinquish control yes you might actually learn something.
26:29
You might actually be like oh, this was a good warmup, oh, this is great, Like I know, like listen, maybe you're like oh, this is too busy, there's just too much stuff here. Right, Give it a shot, yeah.
David Syvertsen
Host
26:42
And then measure the actions. Athletes right. Oh, this warmup's too much or I don't have enough time. I'm like well, just saw you talking to someone for two, three minutes about something completely unrelated. Just talk to them after class. I'm not telling you not to talk to them. This place is social interaction.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
26:57
I will say, I do that with you sometimes because you like to really warm people up and I got to admit you'll be like all right, why don't you do a whole round?
David Syvertsen
Host
27:06
before the workout I've gotten better at saying option one, option two, right.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
27:11
And then I'm like I don't want to do a whole round. That's going to really tire me out. But so I have to admit I am guilty of that as well. Now that you talk about it, I'm going to try to do better.
David Syvertsen
Host
27:22
Right and if there isn't honest, like Dave, this is too much. You could say that to a coach. And a coach needs what to adjust Feedback, humility. That coach needs to be like you know what. You know what.
27:35
I programmed a warmup for all the classes, my classes on 24.1. And it was kind of like similar to what I did, if you remember, when I was warming up for that, like I went after and got myself tired. I was like, wow, you look like you were doing the workout and I just I'm a very strong believer that it helps you do the workout as long as it's not too close to your actual start time. And someone came up to me and was like I can't do all that. And you know, coach needs to be humble enough to be like you know what. Maybe you're right, have it to cut the reps in half. You know, be flexible coaches, because your rules are not going to be applying, they can't work for everyone. So your view of self and, in parentheses, level of importance right, and removing the outside life to that, because again, I'm still talking about the gym and I have. We have a COO of a huge company that's in our gym and I think very few people know that he's a COO. I didn't know until, yeah, recent, and he's been here for years, like seven, eight years, and I didn't know until like two years ago and to me that's kind of cool, that's humility to me. Yeah, you have like a big swinging, you know what, in here and he's and you're like wait, you Wow, and so he's very important, probably does very well, right, and a lot of people in the gym do very well and I love that and he's very confident. I'm sure he is, he should be. He's earned a lot that it doesn't affect who he is in this gym.
29:07
That to me, is also a sign of humility, because this can be tough. Let's say you're a big boss somewhere. You have a lot of responsibility, very wealthy. A lot of people report to you oh, I, 500 people report to me. That kind of thing, maybe even more right. Maybe I own this. I've had these businesses right. My kids are this like. We're just successful everywhere here doesn't really matter.
29:26
And I think it takes a certain breed of person to come in here and be like all right, even though I am this person outside of this gym, I'm still the person that's gonna come in, look at the whiteboard and I'm gonna go to the actual zone that tells me that the coach tells me to do. I'm gonna use this barbell. I'm gonna do these heats. I'm gonna judge this person even though I don't want to. That is a really cool humility trait that I've seen in this gym so many times and I think it's something that you can really you know build the community up through that that, even though you're a big deal here, when you come in the walls you're no different than the person that signed up last week, other than you have a bigger responsibility to be nice to that person.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
30:09
That's so important. I think I don't try to find out what people do outside the gym because I don't want that to affect who everyone is within the gym. And you're right, we have some big shots that come in. And I remember one big shot at the old gym. He was like one of the wealthiest dudes. He was like what's?
30:28
Some big finance dude who, like retired, he had hundreds of millions of dollars and he couldn't hack it at the gym, not because he wasn't, you know, particularly fit or whatever, like we all start not super fit sometimes, but because he kind of expected treatment that befitted his status outside the gym. And I could tell because someone knew who he was and sort of made a little joke or like sort of mentioned it and he kind of puffed up a little bit and it's like, dude, it's not about how big your wallet is outside the gym at all, it's not gonna happen. Nobody cares. You are a beginner and you have a lot to learn if you're gonna stay here at this gym. And he couldn't hack it, he left, and that's the kind of thing that I can tell if someone tries to bring their outside status in, that's gonna be a problem and that lacks humility.
David Syvertsen
Host
31:20
And I'm telling you right now that guy that you're thinking about, if he stuck with it and checked his own ego at the door and was humble when he came in I guarantee, because he probably has some sort of mental traits in him that will get him and understand the long game that could have made him the fittest he's ever been. I mean, who knows where he is right now, right, right. But if he stayed here and had that humble check in him that even though you're great out there, it just doesn't matter when you're in here he probably could have eventually elevated himself to a really high level of health and fitness. And it's because of humility he didn't get there. So you guys that are listening, right, he's probably not Right, I know.
32:00
You guys that are listening right now, do you hold yourself back at all? Do you think that because of your success or status outside the gym, you deserve to be treated this way? Or you have certain expectations of CrossFit workout program in general that are just not true? Is that holding you back from dumbing yourself down to the fundamentals? Yeah, you know what. Sometimes you do need to scale workouts. Yeah, you know what. Sometimes that chick is gonna lift more than you. If you can't handle that, I'm telling you right now, you will not get what you can out of CrossFit. It like that happens all the time, where new guys come in that are fit, they work out, they're good athletes and Sabrina's lifting next to them, or any of those 6AM girls they're squatting more than this guy.
32:49
This is like dude. You can tell the level of discomfort in someone that lacks humility Rather than just like hey, trust me as the coach, I make it a point to tell guys. It was like everyone in the gym will lift more than you. Trust me, it's not because you're not fit, you just don't know what you're doing yet, or your range of motion's not there, and it's a hard pill to swallow. But if you swallow it, your fitness is gonna be elevated to a higher level.
33:14
What about athletes that are really good and they come in and they expect a certain level of status in here Because they're good in here? Let's take away hey, I'm successful outside the gym, no longer care about that, I'm in here. And there's gonna be two parts to this. Let's start off with the good athlete side. I'm really good, I made these qualifiers, I did these competitions. I deserve this. I deserve this lane. I deserve this pull up bar. I deserve this box. I deserve this wall ball space. I deserve this barbell. I deserve to be next to this person. I deserve to pick my judge. Do you see that, without shitting on anyone? Do you see that? And is there something that we can do as a community. Maybe you're the person that's the problem. Is there something you could do to check yourself that you're not being that person?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
34:04
It's a really good question. I've seen drop-ins who've come in Drop-ins are a problem, yeah who are really excellent athletes and they wanna show everybody that they are awesome CrossFit athletes. Then I've seen some who were awesome CrossFit athletes and yet they were more low-key about it and it bled right in. Yeah, they were just like oh, I'm a guest at your gym, so just fit me in wherever, let me do whatever. Seen it both ways, it's a red flag.
David Syvertsen
Host
34:31
When someone comes in there like I'm good at CrossFit, like I'm gonna show me respect, like saying that you need to be treated a certain way because you're a certain level of athlete is rough and really, again, think about it from the CrossFit community perspective. Right, you're a really high level athlete. That's awesome. It's not gonna do anything for the gym, so you're not gonna get special treatment. Now, when qualifiers come around, this is rough for me. All right, we're gonna have 60 people qualify. I think that many 50 to 60. Woo, we'll see I might be wrong. I just think it's gonna be around there and I think a few won't do it, and this is something I'm going to put out to the whole crowd. So I don't mind saying this right now. Some people are gonna need to video their workouts, Like the full setup, like everything, and it's the worst part of competing online and I'm not going to decide who's videoing who's not. I'm gonna put that out there, message out there. If you want to video, go ahead. If you think you have a shot of semifinals, you go ahead. If you're gonna ask me for my opinion, I'll give you some numbers, but honestly, just don't know either, because it's based on programming and if it's a goal of yours, you know what. You should probably practice videoing because it's a skill, it's a part of competing online. If you don't have it, are you gonna video your workouts? I am okay, all right, and does that? There's gonna be people in the gym that need.
35:55
We had to do this last year with a few people that were videoing that we had to give them like their own little section, because if you put them in a certain section of the gym, other people are walking back and forth. The view is not good. You could get DQed because of that, right, right. So that's where athlete perception is wow. We're giving special treatment to like.
36:14
I'll say her name right now Amy's gonna have to video her workouts. There are a couple others too. She's gonna be yeah, there might be a dozen, to be honest with you, and if she needs, like if there's handstand walks, she's gonna have to have an entire side of the gym and it's gonna be rough to plan around and there's gonna be others that need it as well. So I'll admit this out loud I plan around them first, the people that need the video, not because they're better, but because of what they need, and that is going to challenge a lot of athletes in the gym that are not videoing, that still need to get the workouts in. They are just as important that this doesn't turn into she's getting special treatment. She can take my space.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
36:54
I can't do handstand walks, so don't even set up that space for me, and I'm not videoing anything either.
David Syvertsen
Host
36:59
But those are. That's a really key example of your view of yourself and why you're doing a quarter-final. Do you wanna be a part of it? It's fun, I just wanna have fun. And her view is like I have a shot at semi-final. She's not a shoe-in right, but she's got a shot. I think she's probably top 30 in the world right now after this workout, and so she definitely has a shot at reaching that level and we need to plan around that. And but at the same time, I'll leave in challenges and Amy has no problem with this, so I can say this she should not walk in and be like call the shots, right, she's gonna trust that I'm gonna take care of it, so she'll be taken care of. But she should not walk in and start directing traffic and be like, because she can kill her perception to others and she could also not act in a humble manner by telling people what to do, because that's not her place. She doesn't own the gym, she's not the coach.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
37:51
See that that's where, when you're a competitive athlete and this is where I understand it as well People are going to look at you and think, yeah, that's not a humble person, but that's not what. That's on what?
David Syvertsen
Host
38:04
it is Competitive athletes. I think the person that's saying that is the one that lacks humility.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
38:07
That may be true because, like, you're going to need the same setup, you're going to need all that space and you and listen. As a gym, if we have people who have aspirations to get to that next level, we should support we have to, I mean, and it's more than just what I would need as someone who squeaks into quarterfinals. Let's face it. These people have very high level ambitions and we should support that as a gym, as coaches, as members. I got no problem with that. When you look at any high level athlete like I don't want to compare it to like a Kobe Bryant or Michael Jordan or any of these people, but listen, that focus that you need in order to perform and I've seen it on every level, even at high school, mad Fraser, yeah, Look at high school athletics. I bet you guys all know a bunch of high level high school athletes. What are they doing? They're zoned in and focused on their performance. That's not a lack of humility, that's performance focused. Yeah, and that's that's a difference.
David Syvertsen
Host
39:08
The highest level performers are usually. You have to be selfish by nature.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
39:13
By definition, you are focused on yourself, which I guess means you are self.
David Syvertsen
Host
39:17
Yeah, but and that's selfish is not a bad thing in that environment. That's not. That's not what it is at all. And this is where I think gym owners and coaches and the community as a whole needs to be present with this fact that when quarterfinals comes around and certain people need certain things, there needs to be no extra thought about it. It's just like oh, that's what she needs, all right, she's there, that's what he needs, he's there. Like then that's the end of discussion. There's no texting, there's no whispers, that's just what they need. If someone comes in the middle of July and says like, hey, I'm the best athlete in the gym, I get to be by the door for the running workout, then that's a problem. Right, that's not what we're talking about, all right. Last thing, and then we'll kind of just get wrapped this up Social media and humility.
40:02
I don't want to do another social media episode, but In regard to yourself with your social media, all right, and are you acting again? Projecting humility is not going to work, because different people perceive humility as different things. Some people know you, some people don't. I say you keep that out of your head, but in your heart of hearts, when you are making a post. I always say if you have your own social media, you really it's your platform. You are allowed to do whatever you want. Nobody else should judge it. The only judgment you can give is whether or not you follow that person or like whatever they put out there. That's right, right and that I wish you could just end at that.
40:43
For those that struggle with are people going to think a certain way. If I do this video, if I post this, if I post this message about this video, I think in your heart of hearts, you need to end it. A few mility. As a goal viewers and you want to be perceived as a humble person, you need to have a really strong, confident answer of why you're making a post like that, and you don't need to tell to anyone, you don't need to justify to anyone. You know you get these posts all the time, so I never post about my workout, but here's a post about my workouts Like. That's a clear, like sign You're struggling with this. You don't want people to certain, so you don't want people to think a certain way about you, and I've done that before.
41:22
I'll admit that anytime I make a post, it's like all right, am I? Am I sending the message I want to? And could this make me look a certain way and I've gotten over it the more I do it that I have my reasons for every single post, like everything I do, has thought behind it. You might like it, you might not, don't care about that, but if you are in this struggle bus, ask if you're trying to make that word thirst trap again. Are you just trying to impress other people? That is where I think there's a problem with your own social media. And if you want to take me that as being judgmental, I'm not. It's more of me saying I'm looking out for you and you should look out for yourself that if every intention you have is I hope this person sees this, so they look at me and they think that that's where I think our world, our society in general, especially with the kids now, it causes a lot of long term problems.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
42:20
I would say you're absolutely right. What is the intent? If you are posting, what is your intent, right? I know what my intent is. When I post nowadays, yep, it's usually for one person. Like, I have in mind one person. Usually it's for honestly. It's either for my, it's usually for kids?
42:37
Yeah, usually with your kids, yeah it's usually with Sasha or Nick, and the reason being is I want them to know I support them. Yep, I want them to know that I love them and I want them to know I'm proud of them and that I like being with them. And that's their platform, that's how they see it, right? So if I never posted anything with Sasha or Nicholas, they'd be like do they love, does he love?
David Syvertsen
Host
43:02
Yeah. Like that's really how they kind of judge it. Right, right and whether that's right or wrong is not part of the discussion. That's just the way.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
43:09
It is just the four or the way you perceive it. It's just the four. Yeah, that's the way I sort of think of it, and so I understand, if I just sent it to them, it wouldn't mean it's not a public display, right? So so I understand that I'm sending it to everyone that knows me, but it's really not for you and it's not for Ash or it's not for anyone else. I mean, I'm happy for you guys to see it. Absolutely, I like seeing them, right, but I do, it's really, it's really for them, and and I and that's it Like I have no desire otherwise, and you know what? No, the other reason is is sometimes I like lifting up other people.
43:46
Like that's why I always post, for example, about the Ohio State Michigan game with Kayla yeah, because I can love Kayla, yeah, and it's the best and so I love you know, highlighting that or whatever it is Like if, if there's something that I do with someone that I feel like they need to be highlighted and lifted up, that's that's why I do it. I, I don't. I used to care more about what people thought of me, or or or how I do, and maybe I'm just old and tired at this point, but I don't, I don't care.
David Syvertsen
Host
44:17
I think we all go through phases of it, like I do think there's a curve.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
44:21
Yeah.
David Syvertsen
Host
44:21
Where you really do start to care. It peaks and at some point you're just like it doesn't fill the cup Right Like it did, like you thought it would, or you're just like I, no longer even just thinking about it.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
44:31
So, as a producer, right that's how I feel, but again, I'm of a different generation, like my kids, and I understand their perspective as producers of social media Very different, very different.
David Syvertsen
Host
44:45
So, to wrap this up, what are a few things we can do to check ourselves just in time, because, like I said, it's no different than, you know, being nice or being a good driver. You know, like you're a good driver some days and sometimes you you mess that up Right. Sometimes you send a text message while you're driving and someone honked at you Like you know it's. You go back and forth with these like are you always humble? Probably not. Are you always not humble? Probably not. All right, but I think there are things you can do to self check and these are things I have on myself.
45:12
I've written down, okay, my actions, my words and what do I do out loud, and so what I mean by that is I mean, it's pretty simple my actions and words can project humility, but the out loud stuff I've always I do judge people humility based on how often they out loud say I was wrong or how often they say sorry or how often they say thank you. Those are three things I'm sorry, I was wrong and thank you, and that that's something I always want to make sure I do, like when we have coaches meetings. I always want our coaches. I do care about what my coaches think about me. I do from a humility perspective. I want them to know and think that I'm humble in that I'm not above them. You can say, oh, he's the boss, he's the head coach is the owner. I still want always that all of our coaches be like hey, dave does not project himself, that, he's just bossing us around.
46:06
Even though it gets tough, these are our times. You have to say you got to do this, you do that right. Where I will, in meetings a lot, tell coaches what I do wrong and I'll say sorry to coaches when I screw something up, because to me that that is a public, sometimes hard thing to do, to say I'm wrong and I screwed this up. Where I do know people that I like a lot, they never say sorry out loud ever and that to me is a huge deal. Thoughts on that, without again not criticizing. It's like check yourself. How often do you say thank you? How often do you say sorry? How often do you say I was wrong?
Sam Rhee
Co-host
46:49
You should always be saying thank you.
David Syvertsen
Host
46:51
If you don't have gratitude for others and you're lacking humility on that and you think you deserve it and you don't.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
46:58
The second thing is and this is a fine line there is a difference between being stubborn and being arrogant. So I am very stubborn, you can be very stubborn, but that doesn't mean neither of us aren't humble. If you truly believe in something and you stick to your guns like sometimes things don't go well because you believe in something and you carry it out, you might be wrong. Whether you say you're wrong or not, it depends on the situation and it's up for debate. I'm not saying every time there's a discerning, but I would say this.
47:36
I would say humility and clarity of belief are not mutually incompatible. You can truly believe in something strongly, disagree with others, stick to your plan, do what you want to do and yet still be humble if it doesn't all work out, if you're willing to learn from your mistakes, understand that what you do may not always work out, and that you're willing to reflect and take guidance from others, sometimes in the right situation. So I feel like that and I think you can also have clarity of belief and yet still appreciate and be non-judgmental. So we have disagreements all the time, like the whole glassman thing, for example, disagree about what to do, about disaffiliating and all that.
David Syvertsen
Host
48:33
And you were stubborn, I was stubborn, but we both appreciated and respected each other's choices and thoughts and opinions about stuff I talk about that disagreement with you with a lot of people in a positive manner, yes, and because there are few people, very few, where we can yell at each other and still feel like there's a very mutual respect, like usually for me maybe this is lacking humility I get into a fight with you like that, I'll just crush you off, I'm out, but the next day we're talking about it again and we talk about it in person, all that stuff and that to me I think it's a sign of your humility that we can disagree like that. We can literally yell at each other and still understand that there's a mutual respect for the other side that we just have to agree to disagree on some things.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
49:22
That's exactly right. Like we mutually, we respect each other's opinions. We can be stubborn about what we believe in, but we also appreciate where that other person's coming from, and that is a sign of humility is being able to understand that without, like you said, crossing that person off, and that's important to again try to keep this across fit and we're almost done, I promise.
David Syvertsen
Host
49:45
But I think the biggest issues in our world right now are maybe our country or just political differences, and that, to me, whether it's the news, which is just obvious, what's what they're going on? Just going off for clicks and get attention. But when you see people argue with each other about politics, my number one thought always circles back to like all these people lack humility. They just can't fathom accepting a disagreement Like you're going to disagree on a lot of different things and to me, the fact that you're going to really belittle someone or look down on someone because you don't agree with lifestyle. Situations like that right there red flag, lack of humility and that's why I feel very strongly about it. I reflect on this all the time, since COVID and I have a son. What's the world going to be like in 20 years? I think the biggest issue is people lacking in humility. I really do.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
50:36
I try to look at everybody's posts online, whether they're posting about their workout, how they are, a quote. We have a lot of people who post a lot at the gym. Maybe it's their family, everything. I try to love everything that everyone posts because it's an expression of themselves on some level and we're all at different stages of our lives. So, whether it's the 50th workout post I've seen from you, whether it's the 50th inspirational quote that I've seen from you, whether it's the 50th baby picture I've seen from you, I love it all because it's you. I'm okay with that. I really try not to judge and I feel like, if you're that person who's like man again, why are you keep posting about your baby? We know you have a freaking baby. We all got babies. You're not in a good place. We know it was your kid's first day of school. You're not in a good place if that's how you're reacting to people's social media and it lacks humility. You're lacking humility because it's like you know what they're expressing themselves. What is it to you? Zero, just enjoy it.
David Syvertsen
Host
51:41
Like it, like you said, if it really triggers you unfollow Very simple Thoughts on others, because this circles us to the last thing Thoughts on others. And again, how can I self-check humility? That's what we're wrapping this up with, because I think we should all be always have the wheel spinning. All right, judgment, what we just said, jumping to conclusions and asking questions those are the things that I think can really check your humility from an outward perspective. Right, so we just talked about judging and then, you know, trying to avoid that jumping to conclusions, right.
52:17
And if you don't ask someone questions like the actual, direct source of who you're thinking about, you really bring up that Christian Harris example, dan Dodd example when I didn't know Dan Dodd, I had never asked him a question before like why do you do this? And I don't think anything's wrong If someone comes up to me on a random Wednesday in May and says hey, why do you post your workouts videos? Sometimes my mom has asked me before she goes why do you do that? Why does your shirt off? That's so wrong. And those are like I like those conversations and let the person explain themselves and then maybe from there like all right, it's kind of like a shitty answer, like see you later, like that kind of thing and you just don't associate with them anymore. But if you ever find yourself making a lot of these judgments and you don't have the information available to have a credible judgment because you never ask questions, you know we have a lot of people that are like oh, I'm good at reading people, you get that quote.
53:11
A lot of people say that and I think most people are not good at it and really what you're saying is like you just thought about your own thoughts and now you have like this big, dramatic opinion on something. So, and that to me, that's like. That lacks humility. Like if you really want to get to know a situation or find out what's going on with someone, ask the direct source questions, because to me, when you ask a athlete about their open strategy, that's humility. What are you going to do? What's your plan? And if they ask you like, hey, sam, what do you think, then give it to them. And if you're going to go to them like 433, break up the double on theirs and row at 215 pace, you're not asking questions, you're just thinking about your own thoughts, and I think that's something we can all check ourselves on. Are you asking like I'm a huge fan ask people questions, generate discussion and then you can go from there.
Sam Rhee
Co-host
54:02
I can't think of a better way to finish that off. Yeah, that's probably the one takeaway I would take away from this. Yeah.
David Syvertsen
Host
54:09
All right, guys. Well, thank you. I hope your life just changed. Thanks for coming to the episode on humility on the Herford podcast. But all seriousness, I think if we all can just self-check, like the way we just wrapped it up, I think the gym is better tomorrow, like literally tomorrow, I think, if you ever lose track of things or you find that you're in a bad place judging people, you're angry all the time scrolling through your phone, all that kind of stuff circle back to this episode and I bet you can find at least part of the solution here A make yourself better and B make the gym better. Thank you, thank you everybody, for taking the time out of your day to listen to the Herford podcast. Be on the lookout for next week's episode.
