S03E127 - Listener Q&A #5 - CrossFit Confidence, Resilience, and Community
Coaches David Syvertsen @davesy85 and Sam Rhee @bergencosmetic are back to answer listeners' questions in our popular fifth Q&A session.
Are you ready to unlock the key to building resilience and confidence not only in the gym but in life as well? Get set to embrace the power of having a grinder's mentality in the world of CrossFit and beyond. We share tips on recognizing personal improvements over time, and how quality coaching and training can mold these traits. We’ll also dissect two real-life scenarios where individuals triumphed over seemingly unfinishable workouts, and how that victory propelled their overall confidence in dealing with adversities they face.
Ever dropped into a gym and found yourself feeling out of place or overwhelmed? We've been there and we've got you covered! We'll share our personal experiences and adventures dropping into various gyms around the world, taking you through the etiquette for drop-in visitors and the common issues that you might face—a lack of equipment or unfamiliar workouts. We'll also emphasize the importance of courtesy, respect, and making the most of your limited time to ensure a positive gym experience.
But that's not all. We’ll be delving into the art of community building within the gym and how it transcends into daily life. Discover how friendly conversations and reaching out to one another outside the gym can build enduring bonds. We'll also touch upon the power of positivity and mindfulness in improving the overall gym atmosphere. Finally, we'll discuss how being conscious of our words and actions can impact others, and how avoiding negativity can enhance everyone's gym experience. Join us and find out how you can contribute to building a vibrant and supportive gym community.
0:05 Building Resilience and Confidence in CrossFit
6:20 Confidence and Resilience in the Gym
15:44 Etiquette for Drop-in Gym Visitors
25:48 Experiences and Tips for CrossFit Drop-Ins
33:43 Improving Gym Community and Member Interactions
42:43 Improving Gym Experience Through Positive Attitude
@crossfitbison @crossfittraining @crossfit @crossfitgames #crossfit #sports #exercise #health #movement #crossfitcoach #agoq #clean #fitness #ItAllStartsHere #CrossFitOpen #CrossFit #CrossFitCommunity @CrossFitAffiliates #supportyourlocalbox #crossfitaffiliate #personalizedfitness
Show 127 Q and A
[00:00:00] David Syvertsen: All right. Welcome back to the HerdFit Podcast. I am coach David Syvertsen. I'm here with my cohost, doctor and coach Sam Rhee. I'm recording here on a Thursday morning.
Sam just got done coaching the 5 6am. Uh, really tough workout today. Squat cleans, box jump overs, and then ascending weights and movements on the rig. Um, so it was fun. I got to just watch the 6am while I sat on the bike in the back and it was really, really fun class. Good class by Sam. Good performance by the 6amers as usual.
Um, and this morning we're going to go over, um, the, the next Q and a, I think this is number four, the fourth herd fit Q and a, uh, and just a reminder, if you have anything that we want to talk about, we could do a full episode on it, or if it's something a little bit shorter, like these questions, um, we'll jam a few together into one episode.
So don't ever hesitate. If something comes to mind, especially with the changing landscape of CrossFit, which we're going to get into in the future, um, if there's things you want to talk about or us to discuss with guests. Uh, ourselves, uh, just let it know, let us know. Uh, but today we're going to dive right into the first question and it, it was asked in the manner of how do I develop this in my kids, but I'm going to kind of shift this more towards kids, but also you yourself as a CrossFitter, how does one build resilience and confidence, uh, in the gym?
And then we always say that these, these traits in the gym will translate to what you are and who you are outside the gym. Um, is that the case for everybody? No, but I've been doing this for about 12 years now. I've been coaching for over 10 years. And owning a gym for almost 10 years now. I have seen so many personality traits show up in the gym before they show up outside the gym.
Alright, and I think one of the tightest, or one of the biggest reasons why the bonds are very tight within the CrossFit community and from the outside it's cultish, right? Is that you really do get to know people on a very deep level because of the amount of struggle that you see them go through. You really don't know someone until you see them struggle.
And... That's kind of like a glass half empty approach when I say that out loud, but it's true, because... Everyone is great when things are going well. Your body feels good. You feel like you look good. Your friends are happy. Your family's happy. You're healthy, right? But the second that struggle comes into play, you see a different side of people.
And I don't want to say that's who they really are, but I kind of do feel that way. That if you completely turn into a different kind of person, once things get hard, that those are kind of like true colors showing. So Sam, just touch on that real quick, because you've been in this space for a long time.
And I even think, I mean, both of us, I think. can credibly say that we've changed since we started CrossFit. Yes. All right, we had personality traits that are both good and bad. We have personality traits that are both good and bad, but I've seen it in you and I've seen it myself and I've others has heard uh said the same to me.
Changes have occurred since you've really gotten into CrossFit and I think that part of it is the confidence has built and resilience. Talk about that briefly, um, in relation to yourself.
[00:02:59] Sam Rhee: I think, um, this is a really good question and I think part of it, um, when I think about how to answer this about building confidence and resilience is the first thing is, is as, as you said, a lot of people come into the gym and I would ask yourself, what is it that I bring into the gym?
to start. And some people already have a lot of confidence and resilience in general, and I have seen that when they have come in and, and they have done so well just because they intrinsically have that. I personally have never been Uh, the best person in the room ever for anything. Like I've been beaten down probably my entire life in terms of competing or, or working within groups or, or trying to achieve something.
So it wasn't hard for me when I came into CrossFit to be like, okay, I'm not the best. I suck. Um, I'm just gonna keep grinding. Like, that has sort of been the way I've always experienced, uh, like, you know, accomplishments or what I've done. Um, and so to me, it's felt natural to come in regardless of What kind of praise or, uh, you know, good job type of things people were saying to me, you know, um, because I never felt like I was doing that.
I just had to keep grinding, and if you have a grinder's mentality, that translates pretty well into CrossFit. Yeah. Um, the, I did develop more confidence once I could see that I was improving. And I think that you have to, sometimes you don't really see that in yourself, uh, and it helps if a coach, and I like doing this, is pointing out to people after three months of starting CrossFit, how much they've changed, how much improvement, because they might not see it.
Sometimes I really wish I could just videotape, I mean, you know, video, um, when they first start. Because six months after that, if I showed them, hey, listen, this was how you were doing your cleans, or this is, and I have one horrible video of myself when I first started. And you look at it and you're like, wow, I've really made a lot of changes.
Um, that just knowing what you've done, not in comparison to others, but what you yourself has accomplished, that, that probably can help a lot in terms of knowing that You're building confidence in yourself.
[00:05:28] David Syvertsen: So, and to, to build off that. I think that they're all in the same. I literally, I just made a post on my Instagram last night about trying, you know, trying to coach and train at the same time and you can do both.
You can get better at both at the same time. To improve yourself outside of the gym and to improve yourself inside the gym, I really think they can and should happen simultaneously and they can feed into each other. They can feed off of each other and, but you have to kind of be present. So, this is what I mean, okay?
Um, I was not, shocker, not a good student growing up, and... It was, I just never really felt like I wanted to do the work. It was, I'd never, I always wanted to do something else rather than, hey, do something now so that it improves your future. I didn't really care about future. I didn't have perspective of future, um, and much to my parents dismay, like that was one of our biggest fights growing up.
I was never a failing student. I was always, I was just kind of happy with C's and B's and I was like, Hey, as long as I can move on to the, to the next stage, um, I'm good. And if I ever am in threat of not moving on to the next stage, right, then, all right, fine. I'll pick it up for a little bit. And every now and then I would have a situation like that where you really, Hey, you have to do well on this test.
You have to do well on this exam. You have to do a good job on this paper. Then I would grind really hard. I would do so well on that test and everyone was like, whoa, where did that come from? Do so well on that paper. My teacher was like, where did that come from? Did you plagiarize? Right? And there was a feeling back then, I can remember it very well, that it was like a dopamine rush slash a huge sense of fulfillment that nothing else could match.
So you got that taste early on and, but it was never consistent. Alright, years later I go to college, you get a fresh start, and that's when I started to really work hard. In some eyes, that was a little too late. In my eyes, it was good for me. That's when I really started to, I guess you would say grow up, and start to really be forward thinking.
Think five years down the road, ten years down the road. And it has helped me and I did feel for a long time, like especially early in my twenties, like I was probably like five years behind some of my friends. I had a lot of smart friends growing up and I felt like I was a little behind them in terms of I should have learned how to do work like this five years ago.
So I knew that once I started my career as a broker, once I started CrossFit coaching, once we started the box, right, I had this. Past failure in my head of saying I'm not gonna go down that path again I'm gonna do so many things right now to make my situation better two years from now And then when I get to that two year mark I'm gonna do so many things to make my better five years from now and that has built and strengthened over the years and the Reason I'm bringing this up is I think the way to build confidence and resilience in the gym to help yourself out of the gym Right is to find ways to relate the two fine.
This is what I actually think Makes a coach, a good coach, a great coach. It's not cues. It's not your level three. Sorry, CrossFit. It's the ability to relate to different people. You, we have so many people in the gym. We've had, what, 90 people come to the gym so far this morning. They're all different, different backgrounds, different experience, different motivations.
If a coach can relate to each one of them. Even though they have nothing to do with each other, that's when you start to see like a real result. The confidence as a coach, the confidence as a relationship builder. So tie this back to your kids or yourself. All right, find ways your life experiences that you've that you can apply to the gym or find experiences that you're in the gym that you apply to your real life.
Example, we trying to think about two people that just finished this workout, right? Elena Ramzan and Kristen Torres. They, they, they both just finished a workout that Sam said about 12 hours ago, nobody can finish. I thought it was unfinishable. It is very close. I mean, they, they got by by the skin of their teeth and they did a great job.
Okay. When they started CrossFit, if you told them five years ago, or right when they started, I mean, Elena started so long ago, Kristen, I'm not sure. I think it was probably five or six years ago. They'd have no shot at getting to the halfway point of the workout. Oh,
[00:09:33] Sam Rhee: I remember Kristen Torres working on her bar muscle ups maybe a year or a year and a half ago.
I mean, the progress she's made with that has been
[00:09:41] David Syvertsen: tremendous. Right. So, and that takes a lot of time and a lot of grinding. Okay. So let's say that one of them or both of them comes up in a situation in their career where they want to achieve something within their career, but they just, it is so far away from where they currently are.
This experience in the gym of doing really hard stuff that maybe Less than 1 percent of the world population can do. They can do it. And they grinded their way there, it took years of work, years of adversity too, alright, especially Elena with her shoulder going back and forth right throughout the years and she's had to try this, try that.
Now, she's doing things that almost nobody can do, and I mean that. Like, out there in the real world, almost nobody can do what she's doing. Now, let's tie this to a career thing, or something outside of career, that seems so far out of reach, I'm never going to get there. She has built this confidence and resilience that, hey, there is going to be a step by step process, and there's going to be speed bumps, there's going to be some doors that are shut, you're going to have to turn around and find another door, another avenue to this result, but you can get there.
And I think that's where... You have to be present with this idea that all this adversity that you hit in the gym or if you want to reverse engineer this and say all this adversity that you hit in the real world, right, you do rise above it. You just don't decide the exact route to get there. But if you can do something so hard outside the gym, it should apply to what you do inside the gym.
[00:11:05] 2023_1102_0631: There
[00:11:06] Sam Rhee: are two things I want to add. One is, uh, we use Alina and, uh, Kristen as examples. But it doesn't mean that if I have a tremendous amount of confidence and resilience, I'm going to be like Elena and Kristen. Like, I'll never match their performances in the gym. It's just, it's more of a relative thing where they have been to where they are now.
We like looking at them because they are performing so well at the gym. But even some, you know, there are a couple people I would have in mind from the 5 and 6 AM who have, they're pretty early in terms of their CrossFit sort of experience. And yet they have made tremendous gains and have really done well.
The one thing I will say, and I, you translated, uh, what's your past experience has been? How do you translate that into the gym and connect that back out? Um, Kristen and Elena, they both worked better today because they were in the same lane together and they were working right next to each other. And that reminded me of, um, you talk about your past life in terms of what you've done.
When I was a medical student and I had to study for step one, back then that was basically the standardized exam just like an SAT would be for getting into college. It was what determined how, uh, in big part how what residency you could end up going to. So if you wanted to be like a neurosurgeon or cardiac surgeon, like you had to crush that, that score, just like you would have to crush the SAT to, to get into a college that
you would want to go to. And, the discipline and the Mindset to be able to study so much, literally, it's like eight hours a day, pounding, like just sitting there, and I, so what I did was I found two people that did, and I studied with them every day, um, because I knew that if I just tried to do it by myself, I couldn't, and so we'd be there, um, every day, and I'd say, hey, do you guys want to just take a break and get a coffee or something?
They're like, no, we're okay, we're just gonna, So, keep working. And I'll be like, great, I'm gonna have to just stay here and keep studying. And they pulled me along. And if you, um, find that you're lagging sometimes in the gym, that's what CrossFit's for. It's social. You find those connections, and they can help you build confidence and resilience.
And um, now both of these people have gone on and far surpassed me. One of them is, um... Um, she is a neurosurgery professor at Johns Hopkins. Uh, maybe one of the first full, uh, women neurosurgery professors there. Uh, yeah. And the other one is like a big shot dermatologist in Maryland. And so, um, So, both of them have really, uh, helped me, just by, in terms of my ability to be better than I thought I could be.
And I think that also works in CrossFit too, like, these people help each other that I see every day in class. They are driving each other, they are building off of each other, they are building more, um, they're taking, um, Confidence and resilience looking at others and applying that to themselves as well.
[00:14:15] David Syvertsen: Awesome. I love that. Thanks for that. So just to sum that up, I really think the two answers to this question, how do you build confidence and resiliency in yourself and your kids, it's really the two answers there other than, hey, show up. Show up to the party, show up to the workout, show up to the study session.
Other than that... It is, try to find relationships between the two, because they do exist, I promise. They all, like, every single situation you're in, inside and outside the gym, there are relationships with things that are outside the gym that you have already been through. But you have to put thought into that and find them, I promise that they're there.
And part two is get around the right people, because... Confidence, it's not built by yourself. You need some outside voices, outside experiences, and if you find that right crowd, you find your tribe that can do that, and they don't have to be friends either. They can just be people you WOD with at 6am, 3 days a week.
Uh, you know, that confidence and resilience that comes from them and their experiences and you guys feed off each other, that's a big part to that answer. Um, so now we're going to kind of change our focus to two subjects that kind of have to do with each other, but, um, We're going to kind of separate them a little bit.
Um, how does one handle being a drop in? So a drop in by definition is you go to another gym that you do not pay a membership to, and it could be for a week. It could be for a day. It could be for a couple of days. Um, there is a protocol. There's kind of like a few unwritten rules to being a drop in. And what's tough is, you know, I I've been a drop in so many different times and I've had so many different drop ins come here.
And what there isn't a template and every gym has its own way of doing things. Some are a little bit more organized than others. Some gyms really, a lot of their businesses, especially in destination cities and, and, uh, countries, right. Where a lot of their business is, is drop in base. Like they, they need that income to keep their doors open.
Um, other gyms, it's like, sometimes it's, you'll feel like you're annoying them by, by dropping in because they're, you're kind of messing with their local flow. So, Here are a few basic rules and say, I'm just going to go one by one. And because you've dropped in probably even more than me, because you travel a lot.
[00:16:25] Sam Rhee: I, I do like dropping in.
[00:16:27] David Syvertsen: Yeah. I would love to hear your experience or just like your feedback on each of these. There's three of them that I have. Um, first one show up on time, if not early, because usually when you're a drop in, there's a process that needs to be taken on, waivers, signing in. Payments, someone needs to show you where things are, the bathrooms, locker rooms, all that.
If you're a drop in and you're showing up no, like later than, sorry, if you're showing up later than five minutes early, you are way too late to be a drop in and please don't ever show up after class starts as a drop in. I've had that over the years a few times. to throw you outside the window, um, but hey, I'm nice and I won't do that, but I do think bad thoughts in my head.
Sam, number one, show up on time and that means more than five minutes early.
[00:17:11] Sam Rhee: Yeah, when I drop into a place, first of all, I get super nervous every time I drop in. So if you get nervous dropping into a place, I get nervous. I've done it a bazillion times. I still get super nervous. I worry I can't find this place.
So I will often get there like this. I'm nervous. Like 20, 30 minutes in advance, like before the coach even shows up, I'm like standing outside the building, like, uh, you know, what's going on? And, uh, and I don't mind that, like, I, I find that it makes me a little more comfortable if I get there early and I'm not feeling like I'm rushed or, or anything.
So, so absolutely you, I would say at least 15 to 20, um, and, uh, if you're not sure where this place is, give yourself
[00:17:50] David Syvertsen: even a little bit more time. Yeah, and chances are, if you're dropping in, you're either on a work trip or you're on vacation, you probably don't feel great, you got off a plane, you're not eating well, you're drinking, you're up late, right?
Getting there early also helps you, even if you're taken care of quickly and there's like 15 minutes, hop on a bike or a rower and just start warming up. Generally need a little bit longer warm up time. Great idea. So, and what I always like to do as a drop in is find an assault bike. That's like my ideal.
I'll hop on a rower if I need to. But again, don't disrupt class. Like don't go take someone's bike that's working out with it. Um, and just watch the gym. As you're warming up for 10 minutes, like, just look around. Where is everything? Where are the bands? Where are the PVCs? Where are the barbells? Where are the wall balls?
Where are the weights? Where's the bathroom? Um, and you know, what's the protocol for class? Like, you know, is there something in that gym that you have not seen before? And like, what's the deal? You know, that, that's a big deal. It kind of knocks. Two birds out with one stone. You can get an extra warm up in which you probably need and You can kind of get like the full like lay of the land, right?
there's nothing worse than showing up and just like asking a coach every two minutes where something is because you just weren't there early and You know anytime you're a guest anywhere a restaurant someone else's house you you do you want to be ultra respectful like if there's A decision to be made, this or that, pick the more respectful one.
And one of those ways to show respect is to just get there early and not take someone else out of their element, out of their flow. Like you can't go ask a coach who's going over snatching, you know, where the green bands are. You know, you can usually figure that stuff out on your own if you hop on a bike and just look around the gym for 10, 15 minutes.
Part two, I think the most important part to being a drop in is kind of applies to being a member too, but be the quietest person in class and meaning listen more than talk. So again, usually when you're a drop in, you're there with some friends or family members. All right. Yes, I do know some of you guys do this by yourself and this wouldn't really apply to you, but Even if you're in vacation mode, you have to be locked in for that class.
Even if you're not really focused on training that much, you just want to get a good sweat so that you can just kind of, you know, check that box. You have to be so locked into the coaching, um, and the environment in your class because again, you are the guest and being respectful, um, saying please, thank you.
Giving someone else like the spot on the pull up bar or the spot by the door. You never, especially if you're wearing a CrossFit bison shirt, want to give that gym a bad reputation. I've had this as a gym owner and coach before. Someone comes in from box XYZ, right? And they're kind of douchey, you know, they're, they're kind of like, uh, doing like an open gym workout during our warmup.
They are not listening. They are not scaling appropriately. They're, they're kind of like. I've had someone talk on the phone during the whiteboard talk, and it made me think really bad about that gym before. And that's something that, you're kind of representing something bigger than yourself when you drop into a box and say you're from box XYZ.
What do you think about that?
[00:21:04] Sam Rhee: Uh, I agree. I have been to boxes where... They, uh, not to pat myself on the back, but, you know, they said, you know, me and Susan, you know, you guys move really well, like, where do you guys come from? And then I would say CrossFit Bison, and then they would say, where is that? I mean, now they would always say, Oh, CrossFit Bison, yeah, we know that.
But, but back in the day, it was like, Oh, where is that? I'd be like, in New Jersey, like, Okay. And so, like, that does, you know, they do associate where you're from and probably what box you're from, especially because I like repping, uh, repping bison. And I do wear my bison stuff when I go out, uh, to these gyms.
Uh, so yeah, absolutely. And we've had great, um, drop ins, not just bad drop ins, great drop ins from other places. And, and, uh, I, I do like think, you know, seeing them move and then associating their, uh,
[00:22:01] David Syvertsen: And lastly, the third thing I would say, because again, this isn't very complex, we're not giving you like step one through 10 on how to be a drop in. I think there's three main things, right? So show up on time, be ultra respectful in class, and after clean up your stuff, right? I clean up more at gyms where I drop in more than I do more than here.
Like meaning I just did a bike workout. I think I have like some sweat drops on the floor, shocker, right? Walked away from it. If I had a drop of sweat on the floor at a gym that I dropped in at, I'll go get a rag paper towel and clean it up. I almost never do that here unless it's like something like, you know, in the middle of August and there's like a pool of sweat.
If I have an. A little bit of chalk on a pull up bar, on a barbell, on a dumbbell, at a drop in, I will clean it off, scrub it, I will leave it better than where I got it, right? Um, and you can make the argument that everyone should do that at their home gym, but I'm not gonna say that, you know, there are certain things we want you to clean at our gym on a day to day basis, um, You know, but I'm not going into every zone after the class, like, hey, there's chalk on the floor, you better sweep that up.
Um, and pretty much every class of every day, that's the case, right? Especially right now, um, with our chalk, it's just a bucket of dust, right? So just the gym just gets so dirty so easily. Um, I'm trying to think of some other examples at the gym that... You know, the, uh, the barbells, right? We asked the members, say, scrape your barbell if there's a lot of chalk on it with those metal brushes.
Um, do we make you do it? No. Do we like that you do it? Absolutely. If I'm a dropping out of gym, I will spend an extra 10 minutes there making sure everything I touched is better than what it looked like before. Because again, it's just a sign of... Hey, I am disrupting, kind of disrupting your flow a little bit here.
I'm the new person. I'm the guest. I'm not taking advantage of you. I want to show my respect to you guys and support the affiliate itself. That just doing a little extra housekeeping of stuff that you touched can really go a long way. Um, because I'm going to tell you this right now from owner coach perspective.
Dealing with drop ins is not easy. It is in a lot of cases just fine, but it really can mess with flow, right? Like if you're a coach that has like, Hey, I wanted to have this done by this, this by that, this, some of that. And then you have two, three drop ins in a class. And they need a lot of attention or they're not very nice or, you know, you haven't seen them move yet.
So you can't, you don't really know their personal flow. It can throw a lot of things off. So just know that you're, you're kind of disrupting someone else's flow. Can you make ups for that by? Maybe just putting in a little extra effort by showing respect to that gym.
[00:24:43] Sam Rhee: Can you, um, give me some of your best worst drop in experiences?
I'd like to hear some of that and then I might relate one or two of mine.
[00:24:51] David Syvertsen: Okay, so my best, my best one, you know, I'll give you, I don't know about a best one. Um, I love it when a drop in comes in and is like, is, and you know, I'm biased here, is a really good athlete and starts, starts kicking ass because it actually, I, I, I make a joke and I'll say this out loud in front of the drop in.
I was like, guys, rule here is the drop in cannot have the best time in class. And like, you know, you have to make sure you say that around the right people, you know, like you can't say that always around everyone, but it's more of just like. Get a couple smiles out of people, even if they're laughing at you more than laughing with you, which I'm always fine with.
Um, but those are always fun when someone come in. So we had someone come in over the summer. Um, and it was Liz's class, I want to say it was a Friday 4. 15 class, we had some ascending hang squat cleans with ring dips and running, and the kid could lift, like, and I was like just that, at that point I was just starting to lift heavy with my knee, and that, and he came in because the announcement, he drove 40 minutes, he saw the announcement, he was like, oh that's the art, yeah.
I think he was actually a little underwhelmed, he was like, oh, I thought there'd be lights, lights everywhere, um, but. We, we went back and forth, like he was beating me on the barbell, I was beating him on the run and ring dips, and we were going back and forth for a while, he had like a southern accent, very nice guy, but those kind of dropped, and then we were like, we talked for a long time after, we talked about the announcement, some of our favorite athletes, um, the worst drop ins that I had was, A, this was at the Old Space, someone talking on the phone during the Whiteboard talk, and then I would say, generally macro level, um, The drop in that feels like they need to do some like open gym work during class.
Like if you're a drop in, do the WOD, get out of here. You know, if you need to stretch and hop on a bike for a little bit, that's fine, but you can't do like a full blown workout where now you're kind of like overstepping a little bit. You're, you're, you paid for the class, but now you're using the gym and equipment again.
Those are kind of my, my worst, uh, Off the top of my head. If something else comes to my head, I'll let you know, but what are yours? So
[00:26:44] Sam Rhee: I'm talking about where I've gone and dropped in. Okay.
[00:26:46] David Syvertsen: Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah,
[00:26:48] Sam Rhee: and so for me Uh, the first thing I would also say is you gotta roll with stuff, because it's never gonna be, oftentimes, a very ideal experience.
The coaches may not be nice, uh, everyone might ignore you, that's happened once or twice to me. That's true. Um, I remember, so, I've been at, when we've traveled, I've always tried to go somewhere, so for example, we, we stopped over in Dubai and, um, there was a place called CrossFit
and, uh, Alioth, and, um, They're pretty well known, but, you know, I was, I couldn't find it. It was literally in this whole area of, like, car repair shops. And I couldn't get a hold of them for two days beforehand. I was trying to, you know, WhatsApp, email, like, their website. No response. They did have a A class time listed, finally like maybe an hour or two before that I got a quick like okay or something like that.
So I went there and I ubered or took a taxi, I can't remember, and I couldn't even find this place. It was filled with these car repair shops and I was like, do I really want to do this? And I almost like got, like didn't go. And I got there and. Uh, I don't know. I'm sorry if anyone from CrossFit Alley is hearing this, but it was like a bunch of expats, no one talked to me, like it was a partner wad.
And so some, some British dude got paired up with me. Um, didn't really like me until I, he felt like I was. Half decent, like in the workout. And then it was like, I got a little bit of like talking to with it. Like there was not enough equipment for everybody. Like it was, it was a really not awesome experience.
Like I didn't know what one of the movements, it was just basically a burpee. You just didn't have to lie on the ground, but they called it something different. And I rolled with the whole, and you just have to roll with it. Sometimes it's going to be that way.
[00:28:34] David Syvertsen: It is. Yeah. You know, I can't say how many times someone has reached out to me and like, Hey, I'm in.
So and so city had just dropped in this gym sucks. Like the workout was this right? And sometimes the workout I'll look at him like, all right, that's not the most fun workout, but I can come up with 30 workouts a year here that are just like, it's kind of boring. You know, it's not that fun. Yeah. You
[00:28:53] Sam Rhee: might come upon a day where the WOD is just something you don't Bodybuilding.
Right. Or you just did it and you're like, wait, I got to do this again. And so, yeah, you just have to roll with a lot of that stuff. I think, um, when we were in Barcelona and we, uh, Susan and I worked out there, they had running and we literally had to run down the long hallway. Out onto the street, there's like, cafes, so you're basically running around these tables and you're like, What the hell is going on here?
And, uh, and, and so, you know, or, uh, And this is not humble bragging, but we, you know, we were at Reykjavik and we worked out at, um, CrossFit Reykjavik. That's awesome. Yeah, and, you know, they're kind of like snooty in the sense that they only speak Icelandic and then maybe they speak a little bit of English too.
Even though they're all perfectly fluent in English. Yeah, right. They just want to... Make sure they're like, we're not catering to Americans because you guys always drop in here. And, um, and the guy's kind of looking me up and down and he's like, what, you're going to finish this workout? And, you know, I'm like, dude, I'm just here to
[00:29:52] David Syvertsen: work.
I'm on vacation.
[00:29:54] Sam Rhee: You want to throw down or something? I'm just here and And, uh, if, you know, I don't know what it is about my luck, but they always program Turkish getups every time I drop in somewhere and I'm like, I don't know how to do these. We never do them at my gym. And so, you know, the first time I ever did them was when I dropped in somewhere and someone showed me how to do it.
And so. Listen, those kind of experiences happen all the time. I know a lot of people at our gym drop in at a lot of places, especially the business guys, like, uh, 5AM, like David M. He's always in Miami, he's in Dallas. He's always dropping in. Like you can talk to people at our gym. They have a lot of experience with drop ins.
I would just say it is fun. It's a great experience. You have to just be prepared for anything. Expect the unexpected. Um, the coaching can be very variable. I will say, but you know, it's, it's a great experience and if anything, it always gives me more appreciation for my
[00:30:51] David Syvertsen: home gym as well. Absolutely. Yeah.
That's, and to wrap this up, you asked me what was, yeah, yours. One of my worst experiences ever. And it's not, again, I don't want to criticize. It's just how this gym operated that they didn't have a warmup, like a class warmup. It was, Hey guys, here's the workout. Here's what you should get ready for. You know, let's come back together in 15 minutes.
Experience CrossFitter, like if in some ways I kind of prefer that personally, but if I, if we have some people in this gym that ask me all the time, what do you think about this gym? Can I drop in here? Can I drop in there? And I'm like, Oh, I hope they have a warmup, you know, like this thing, you don't know how to snatch yet.
So like they, you know, a progression at least. And I was at a gym in North Carolina with Ash years ago. This was not this past trip that we were just on. It was probably five, six years ago. Um, And it was a cool workout, but there was nothing that we did together prior to class. It was just, here's the workout.
See you in 15 minutes. And like the coach almost like disappeared and that's just how they operate. So Sam's advice on you got to be ready for anything. I am a little nitpicky with programming. Like I'll email the gym that I'm going to and I like, Hey, like if they don't post their programming, which most don't anymore, um, I'll ask them like, Hey, I'm coming in on these three days or one of these three days.
Can you just, Um, and I always say like, I just need to know what equipment to bring, but I really, I just want to cherry pick when I'm on vacation. I don't want to go do something that either hurts or, or I'm just not. In the mood to do, I didn't bring stuff for, um, but you know, so being flexible is, is probably the best advice.
Other beyond what we already said with like the respect factor, show up on time, all that stuff is, you know, you're going to be out of your comfort zone and just accept that prior to going in and when in doubt, just scale the workout. You know, just be safe with it. Totally. So this kind of ties into how to be a good member.
The next question was how, how can one improve the experience at the gym by being a member? And this, I don't know who asked this. It sounds like a coach asking a question. This is like, it was like your, your passive aggressive, like there's members that need to know. So we can go down, we've done an episode of this on this before, like how to be the best possible effort.
Or no, I think we did an episode called the three mistakes that Um, CrossFit members make and then we coupled that with, uh, mistakes that coaches make because I never want to be biased, um, for or against members or coaches, right? Um, there's a lot of responsibility on both sides to do your part and. I tried to think about this in a non preachy, non condescending fashion.
Like, what can a member do to improve the experience of the gym for other people? And the one, one of them is, has to deal with drop ins slash new people, right? Because you treat them the same way. I always like to use, um, My brother Aaron is an example because he's, he's member number one or two. It's either him or Megan Miller.
But, um, what, what he does always is when he, when there's a drop in or someone that's brand new, he, he will go introduce himself, conversation, where are you from that goes such a long way that, so you even just like you have this like fresh drop in thought in your head right now, if you see someone and you do want to have Bison have a great reputation, the community to have a great reputation, slash just.
Be a good person, right? Um, go conversate with them. You don't want to have an experience like Sam where no one talks to me. That does. That makes a gym look really shitty. If you're a drop in and no one says anything. I try my best whenever there's a drop in to introduce them to the whole class at the whiteboard.
That kind of breaks the ice a little bit. I tried that too. The next step is the member themselves. Members themselves. Introducing. How you doing? Hey, if you need anything. Hey, the bathroom's over here. If they're looking for something, hey, can I help you with that kind of stuff? Thoughts on that, because we have a lot of people that do that at this gym.
It's not just Aaron. I even think the majority of our gym
[00:34:37] Sam Rhee: does this. I think so. I mean, it does really color your experience when you drop in somewhere, how the members treat you. And I have had a lot of experiences where it's not been so great. And so that's why I always try, because I don't... Want them to have the kind of experience I might've had somewhere else.
Uh, and I think most of our members are that way. The other thing is, you know, even for like newer members who have just joined or are just starting out, I think it is really critical for other, more experienced members. And listen, I get it. And I do the same thing. Like I, I have my friends at the gym and we have our jokes and, and we're joshing back and forth.
Absolutely. And, and it's, it's really fun. But also I think members. Reaching out to newer members, one, is nice, it's, you know, you're helping this member feel more comfortable within the gym, develop confidence, resilience, as we talked about, but also, you might, like, make a new friend, or a gym friend at least, and I've seen that happen time and time again, uh, people who found out they had more in common than they thought, um, and it just kinda helps to build community a
[00:35:51] David Syvertsen: little bit more.
Yeah, absolutely. I mean the, you know, we're almost 10 years in now and I always like to just throw this challenge at some of our coaches especially, but some like key members I'm friends like a little bit like friendlier with outside the gym and stuff. You know, I know you have your clan here, your, your, I don't want to call it clique, but your crew, your tribe, you know, always kind of branch out of it because there's people in that room that are, you know, in a room of 30, they're kind of feeling lonely because they're not in a group.
They haven't been here five years. They don't have kids that hang out with each other. Um, and just a simple conversation. You know, that does not take a lot of effort can go a long way and you actually can benefit from it. You can get a new friend and, um, you know, just put yourself in those shoes. When you, when you first came in here, you were a little intimidated, intimidated as well.
So, you know, step one to being a good member is just really trying to find those newer people in the gym and just simply. Talk to them. It doesn't have to be anything in depth. You don't have to invite them over for, you know, a drink at night. Just have a conversation with them and see where it leads. Um, being a good enough member, not part two.
Again, this is not being a good athlete. This is not improving as athletes is being a good member in the gym. Um, one thing I would say, uh, of trying to, I just lost my train of thought. Well, one thing about being a good member here is trying to connect with the, the, the people outside the gym as well. This is, this is a little bit more difficult because.
We just said, like, hey, talk to people in the gym, don't have to hang out with them, but hey, if you want to be a good member, you should be hanging out with people outside the gym. So I don't want to talk out of both sides of my mouth, but this is what I mean by that. There are certain personality traits that you're just not going to see in the gym as often as you will outside the gym and A big reason why we see people leave the gym, right?
We don't have a high turnover rate, but we do every gym has a turnover rate when I've talked to people like hey I left I came back. I left I came back. It wasn't necessarily that the environment at the gym was poor Right? Like it's always a pretty positive environment here. I think that's something that Bison does a really good job with, but there could be like, Hey, no one really reached out to me outside the gym when I was hurt.
Um, no one reached out to me at no one reached out to me when I was gone for two weeks. Now there's a little bit of, you know, a gain there, an art that you're gonna have to play with. Like, Hey, like. People have lives too. We can't give you our attention 24 7, 365, but it's something that I struggle with and I also want to get better at.
I want our staff to get better at it. And we've talked about different ways of doing this is really trying to stay on top of people when you don't see them for a while. And when you're at, we have your holiday party at your house coming up. Who are you hanging out with? Is it going to be the same nine people that you like give high fives with and work out on Sundays?
Is it going to be the same people that you, you always hang out with all year? Can you spend some time finding the two people in the corner of the tent at the social event and ask them some questions, right? I do this every single year and Dave, you're the owner. You should do it.
[00:38:52] Sam Rhee: I was about to say, this seems like more of a mandate for coaches than it is for the member.
[00:38:56] David Syvertsen: But you, you are asking, a member is asking, how can I improve the experience at the gym? Go And it's a group effort, you know, we have 12 coaches, there's 340 people that are coming here right now, like, we can't get to everybody, we're gonna need some of you guys to do that too. So if you are a member that is trying to improve the experience of the gym, it ties into number one, it's the interpersonal conversations, the interpersonal, um, interactions that you have with people, of really kind of going out of your way to make them feel like they're not just this person that you only work out with a few days a week, there's actually interest in what they do outside the gym.
[00:39:30] Sam Rhee: Yeah, I think, um... For me, it's, it's funny. I'm, I'm, I'm a more of an introvert than an extrovert. I am too. And so for me, I find it very easy to talk to people at the gym, talk about CrossFit, about their performance, their health, like, you know, their goals in terms of. Accomplishing what they're doing in the gym.
I have always found it hard to reach out and be like, so what do you do? What's your van like all these personal things like yeah Sometimes it works for me. Sometimes it
[00:40:04] David Syvertsen: doesn't and that's okay. Yeah. Yeah. I think the effort goes a long way though That's the thing. Yeah, I
[00:40:09] Sam Rhee: would say No doubt. I I do like talking to people, uh, in social situations outside the gym.
And I mean, almost like interview, I have more of an interview style. I don't know why I do that, but, uh, uh, but I do learn a lot about people and as long as they're willing to share whatever they were, they're willing to share. Um, I remember way back in the day before Joel Trello was, um, on, you know, a famous CrossFit celebrity, like talking to him at one of the events and he talked a little, like just like kind of skimmed that experience that he had that he talked about with CrossFit.
And I was like, wow, this guy has got some deep stuff there, like really deep. And it made me respect Joel a lot just from hearing a little bit of it. I'm so glad he shared his whole story. Um, and. I do really like hearing people's backstories. It's really interesting. It adds depth to them. It helps me understand them better at the gym as well.
Um, I don't necessarily go to these events looking to like, um, find my best bud or something like that. Right. Um, but, uh, definitely. The more I connect with people on that level, the, the deeper and better that I understand myself a little bit because I'm like, wow, I see a little bit of myself in there
[00:41:35] David Syvertsen: too.
Yep. Again, what we talked about on that previous topic, you're relating some of yourself because you're a good coach. That's what good coaches do. You can relate yourself to other people just after you hear kind of their
[00:41:44] Sam Rhee: story a little bit. Right. And so, uh, And we have so many different, interesting people.
That's what blows my mind. Like, I would never be able to meet, um, you know, as many different people from as many different walks of life as I would here. And if you just give it a shot and just talk to some people, you know, I see the finance bros, I see the law enforcement people, I see the healthcare guy, you know, people, I see, you know, um, people who have all their side gigs at home, like, just so many different, you know, interesting things that people do.
Like, It's fun. It's fun to hear those
[00:42:19] David Syvertsen: things. Last thing, how can a member improve the experience of other people at the gym? Um, I think... Don't complain. You know, we all say bad things in our head. We all have bad thoughts about the workout, the coaching, the people, the smell, this, that, this, that. Okay. I am huge on that.
We are all products of our environment, okay? You can be a very independent, strong-willed person. You're still a product of what other people do and say around you, you are okay. That feeds all that. That goes the other way too. The people that you're around are the people that are around you. They are in some ways a product of how you are and what you say and how you act.
So. This is a really, it's a positive place, you know, to the people who are like, people actually get annoyed how positive it is. I've actually, you know, I've told that story before where people are like, dude, stop being so positive here at the gym. It's like, alright, cool, see you later. Um, I, I, I want you to almost, in some ways, try to not fake it.
But look for the positive more than the negative because when you have a room full of people or even a half room full of people that are just complaining about the workout, how they feel, what they look like, how they can't do what they used to be able to do, right? When you start hearing that over and over and over again, you're going to kind of ruin that that positive vibe that the gym got and the reason why the gym does well and why it changes people's lives over and over.
Is people are looking for that. They, they, they need something in their day. Um, that, that is positive. That's for themselves, right? I just had a conversation with someone in your class and during the warmup about who's going through something really serious right now, some family stuff. And we got talking about like, dude, I know it's really hard on you too.
Like you have a lot of stuff that you have to deal with and you're just nonstop all day, all morning, every day, 24 seven. He goes, I'm so glad that you get to come here and give you like that one hour of positivity. Getting out some frustration, working hard, being here for yourself, not having to do anything for anyone else, just work hard and, and that kind of environment can be ruined if you're in a room full of people complaining about the workout, how their front rack feels, what they look like, someone else is shaving their reps, right?
I think there's a lot of things that a member can do, um, do to create the, the experience for everyone else's, uh, being better. But I think the most important one is keep your mouth shut when it comes to the negative stuff. Um, and there's a time and place. Like I had someone yesterday come up to me like, Hey Dave, the girls locker room smells really raunchy.
You know, there's, there's, um, There's weighted vests in there, I don't know what it is. So I went in there, we, you know, we did some recon and couldn't really find what it is. And, um, those are the, that's not a complaint to me at all. Even the person said like, hey, you know, I never complain. I just want to let you know, like, dude, we need to know that stuff.
And for the record,
[00:45:06] Sam Rhee: I don't think any of our girls smell badly. I don't know what
[00:45:09] David Syvertsen: it is. I have a feeling I know what it is and it has nothing to do with any person in the gym. Um, it was something, um, in the vents. But anyway, we'll talk about that another time. But to me, that's not a comp I just want to say, that's not a complaint.
Like, if there's actually a problem in the gym, Hey, like, the bathrooms aren't clean. But, you know what I'm talking about. And everyone knows what I'm talking about. The little things that you feel like you have to say so that you can just get it off your chest. Is it improving, or? Making the vibe in the room worse, right?
Like I think it goes a long way because people, there's a lot of people out there. They're very sensitive to words, probably more sensitive than they should be towards, but it's just the truth of the matter that people are. So if they hear this negative negativity, they hear that negativity, they hear this complaint, they hear that complaint.
It really can turn this situation into something that's negative more than positive.
[00:45:58] Sam Rhee: I complain. But do you really? I feel like... I am a complainer, no? I mean, one of the things, and you've heard me complain multiple times, and it's one of my pet peeves, is people signing up for 6am and then dropping at the last second, or not dropping at all, and I've bitched about it a lot, and I've bitched about it to my classes, too.
That's true. And so, I am as guilty as anyone else for, in terms of that. Now... That being said, um, Don't cancel reservations. Like, uh, I have realized to some degree that I need to shut up about it because I keep complaining and what's the point? Like, it's not a huge problem. It is a minor, minor, minor problem.
Um, and it's a problem resulting from a good thing, which is that so many people like want to go to our morning classes. They're very
[00:46:50] David Syvertsen: popular. And I talked to coaches about this, right, at our last meeting. You know, I don't want to disclose everything we talk about at meetings with coaches, but I said, I was like, how you act and what you talk about while you're stretching, warming up.
It can kill a vibe. You know, I've had so many rough nights, uh, with Brock over the past two years, like anyone with a young kid. And I feel like he's RX plus in terms of making our life difficult at night. He's been great lately, but we, we really had a 12 month period, August to August, uh, that was really rough.
And I can't tell you how many times I've come to the gym on two, three hours of sleep. With 30 people like needing me to be on top of my game, um, and wanting to like vent and complain. And I try really hard unless it's provoked, right? Unless someone's like, Hey Dave, how's this going? Hey Dave, how's this? I don't want to go out there and just talk about how hard my life is, or my knee issues, or right now like dealing with an Achilles issue as I train for Legends.
Like, I'm not gonna tell the entire gym about it because It can create a negative environment and it can make them start to think about what hurts on my body. Is CrossFit dangerous? Should we be doing this? That kind of stuff. Um, like I just got done listening to Greg Glassman, um, talk on Mark Bell's podcast.
It's a good listen. Um, be ready for a lot of things, but it's worth listening to. I'll just say that. And he said, he goes, one of the markers of a great CrossFit community is the coach. They don't talk about themselves. You know, and he's talking more about accomplishments, like, you know, like, I'm not going in front of my class like, oh, I won this competition, guys, I did this, I did that, I did that, right, in front of my classes as we're trying to warm up for thrusters and pull ups, like, they don't care about that, right?
I'm very adamant, like, the people do not care about what you've accomplished or what you haven't accomplished. You can go the other way as well. But I also can, uh, bring that up with your personal life or any struggles that you're going through that If you're going to talk about everything, every complaint that you have under the sun, whether it's in or out of the gym, how would you not expect that to translate into members heads?
And I know I don't want to come down on coaches here, all right, but members take this rule and responsibility on yourself that I will, I promise you, nobody wants to hear about your problems unless they ask you, hey, how are things going? Um, But if you feel, or no one wants to hear what you think about the workout either, uh, because every workout that you hate, I guarantee someone in that room loves that workout.
Every workout that you love, I guarantee someone in that room hates it. Same with your playlists, right, members? I just had someone complain
[00:49:21] Sam Rhee: mightily this week to me while we were working out like, this music is
[00:49:26] David Syvertsen: It's, I'm telling you, someone in that room loves it. And you're just gonna have to suck it up.
Well, at least the coach does. Yeah, right, right. So, I think, was it Michael Baylis? No comment. Um, but, I think that can go a long way. Again. I'm talking to everyone, but this person asked what can a member do to make the experience better for other people, right? Um, that, that is probably my biggest thing.
Complaints go a long way, especially if you're a notorious complainer. I guarantee the people around you are going to become that as
[00:49:55] Sam Rhee: well. I, I do feel like we're not saying bottle it up. And don't, don't say anything to anyone because that's really hard. And, and I have heard many people around me complain, not, not out like in a huge way, but they'll say, you know, even, you know, for example, Susan at home, like, wow, that was like, that's not in the gym now.
Right. Right. And so whatever she does, she's doing. Like, listen, she is venting, she is complaining, I vent, I complain all the time too. Which is healthy. Right, you have to, you have to let your feelings, you have to express them, but there is a way to do it where you're, like you said, not bringing the gym down, where you're not in front of people and and sort of presenting poorly because, let's face it, it's not just how the gym is reflected, it's how you are, like, how people think of you.
So, and I know some people at the gym, and I like them, but I really know they've got They always act like the world is on their shoulders. And it's real tough being around them. Like sometimes, you're just
[00:51:01] David Syvertsen: like, dude, like... It's heavy. It can actually bring your class down, your workout down. Right.
[00:51:09] Sam Rhee: I'm sure if we held up mirrors to all of us, we'd say, wow, that may not be the best look for ourselves.
And so it, it's not a bad idea just to sort of, you know, self check a little bit and be like, all right, if I, what am I saying, like making things better? Am I making myself not look so awesome? Um, I am as guilty of that as anyone else, but it, it, it's not hurtful. It's helpful for us to just sort of self reflect a little bit about it.
[00:51:36] David Syvertsen: Yep. Be cognizant and. I promise it can make the gym better if you're more present about it, if you're more present with what you're saying and how you're acting. I promise it can make the gym better and which is going to come back in your favor. It's going to make things better for you. I promise it'll happen.
All right. Thank you guys. That's it for the Q& A. If you have any more that you want to send our way, we will get to another one probably in another month or two. Um, and what we have coming up, we have a couple, uh, we're gonna have a couple of guests on. I'm going to try to get some people from Bison on just to talk about some things, um, in relation to the state of CrossFit, the future of CrossFit, which is always, always fun.
And, um, you know, we have a lot of things changing around us, always things to talk about there. And we have a subject coming up on, on humility and how that can help you in and out of the gym. And I'm telling you what, dude, we are just a couple months away from reset. The open and I just can't wait till this time of year.
This is when the leaves start changing, the weather gets colder. Um, but you also know that we're getting that much closer to the best time of the year here at CrossFit
[00:52:34] Sam Rhee: Bison. Dan Koda just texted me 1932.
[00:52:36] David Syvertsen: Let's go! Nice Koda! All right, take that everyone. Take that Coach Sam. See you guys.
